Simple Feel-Good Activity ... (Dec 30)

... For Ringing In The New Year with JOY on The Brain!

[I owe this simple little practice to an amazing friend (Jesser) who gave me an amazing handmade (professionally-so, of course) card for Christmas one year]

FAVORITE THINGS!

Yep ... that's it. I told you it was simple!
Get out a sheet of paper and start the list, baby. (do alone or with friends/family)

A few of mine:
*leaves crunching under foot
*smell of garlic and onion sauteing in olive oil
*Ruby's LAUGH
*solve the world chats with a friend
*hiking, biking in the mountains
*Cheesy 80's rock
*Telluride Bluegrass Festival
*hosting dinners with Guillermo
*sunlight or moonlight cast on water
*smiles from a stranger

You get the idea.
Just keep going/listing ...

WARNING: authentic smiling and happy-juiced-up-on-life feelings may result!

Ahhhhhhhhhhh. (take the time)

Step Outside the Circle ... (Dec. 27)

... and Into Your Truth.

Hmmmmmm. Gets you thinking, hey?!

Step Outside the Circle and Into Your Truth.
I'm crystal clear on what I mean as I write the above, and yet still swirling on the idea a bit.

So, I'll merely begin by beginning ...

A conversation with a valued and trusted friend, and a read of another friend's book (Fat is not a four-letter word) got this brain of mine humming. I found myself contemplating the self-implied dichotomy of "reaching the masses," all the while "owning my truth."

(the thing is ... I feel I'm still creating my truth, and will continue to do so as I make my way through this life. But that is a whole other topic indeed!)

Anyway, as I swirled around with these ideas I found myself challenged (in a good way). It was the idea of stepping out of the circle and stepping into my truth that got me first.
This concept of dancing to the beat of your own drum regardless of what the majority is doing. I've done it successfully (and quite messily) on numerous occasions in my past. I've been complimented for "being myself." (now isn't that an interesting compliment!) And yet ... the words on the page and the feelings they evoked STOOD OUT.

There are still areas of my life, interests, career-passion fulfillment where I play it safe (aka. keep it under wraps for fear of being more of a satellite, for fear of what it will do to my existing world) And even as I write this, I'm smiling a knowing kind of smile. The smile that says: Go! Do! You'll create "it" in a manner that's truly perfect for you (and thus all). Still, it does require fear-management and self-awareness so as to ACT and DO from a place that is my truth. (cause darn it! ... things, conversations, etc., ALWAYS go better when coming from your truth with a capital T ... rather than from defensiveness/ego)

Okay ... so I swirled that to an acceptable-to-me-for-now state, and came back to the idea of reaching the masses in conjunction with the above. Seems easier to manage the before-thought dichotomy now.

BALANCE it. Holding TRUE to Me.

For me it means I embark upon the path I've already set for myself ...
MOVE and ACT in the direction of my heart's career! Coaching/consulting/writing/ETC. (that etc. tends to be a catch-all)
Set up my 2011 schedule with activities that SUPPORT this ... and communicate them to those around me! (the setting-up is a fun process in and of itself!)
And, create a more seamless and "wider-reaching" web presence that includes my vibe/energy by way of profile and blog and writing style .... but includes verbiage/language and services list with the intent to reach WIDER. Plus the other necessary bells and whistles. (Hmmmm? Think I'll need some assistance and feedback to make that happen?! Yes! And, rightfully so if my goal is to branch out)

So, in the 'end' ... these contemplations brought me HOME again. Confirmation of my chosen path.

Thank you to my two friends (conversation and book) that sent me down this path. The destination - a familiar yet sometimes elusive place.

And as I close this blurb, I am holding space for MY stepping out of the circle and into my truth!

Perhaps you do the same for you?!

LOVE.

Holiday Giving (Dec. 22)

Do you celebrate Christmas?
And, do you find there's a bit of worry/obligation/stress around gift giving?
A pretty natural feeling this time of year ... whether you're a 'Santa Claus' or a 'Scrooge!'

Remember:

*BREATHE
*Put a half-smile on that lovely face of yours
*And, perhaps ... think outside of the gift-box!

Giving Ideas:
* Plan a Get-Together (instead of presents)
* DO something ... instead of buying something. (Do you have a service to offer? (and time to offer it, which is a key question to ask prior to giving) Could you offer to watch a friend's kid(s)? (no, this isn't a shameless ploy to get Ruby-care. wink and smile!), Shovel snow? Make a meal? Other?
* A simple bottle of vino, coffee gift card, or a chocolate bar may be appropriate.
* A book or magazine subscription
* Pot-luck Party, anyone? Share the love! And the food preparation!
* Other Ideas? Share away! We could all use some creative ideas around the holidays!

Regardless ... take a moment or two to GIVE from a good place. (with that smile on your face and warmth in your heart). And, always, always honor YOU when giving.
Doesn't feel right or good? Pause.
Perhaps you fore go traditional giving if it feels appropriate. Try thinking outside the 'gift-box.'

The season IS upon us ... so might as well be mindful to enjoy it. Your choice. Your terms.

Warmth and HUGs to You and Yours this Holiday Season!

Accepting Help (Dec. 21)

My brain is swirling on a number of blog entries that are knocking (aka. begging to be written)

This often happens when away from writing for a while.
Throw in a pre-holiday trip to visit family and friends, and the topics are a-flowing!

Alas, I'll begin with what felt like a bit of a theme over the past week.

In my encounters with friends and family, I found that three separate life-situations got me thinking back to the last months of my grandma's life ... and the lessons I took from her dying process. (lessons I'm still integrating, by the way)

All three situations were entirely unique/different (as you would expect being related to three unique individuals) ... but the theme that presented itself was that of our ability to ask for and accept help - in it's myriad forms.

I'll start by sharing what I wrote many years ago after my grandma's death (the last few months of her life spent in hospice care):

A Lesson From Gram (on the soap box once more)

I stand behind Grandma at the bathroom sink to ensure that should she loose her footing I'll be there to catch her. Watching her brush her teeth - a most mundane task for the majority of us - brings with it a barrage of thoughts and feelings.
I'm aware of the immense amount of energy she is expending. Aware of her frustration and determination as her hands shake severely. Aware of my discomfort watching her struggle.

At the same time, aware of the sacredness of this ... the dying process.

We are a strong people. Independent. Recluse, even. Who do we let in? To what level? Who knows our fears, faults and challenges? And, who knows what makes our hearts sing?

Never before now has it so struck me just how much surrender and beauty is involved in relying on each other. Just how much compassion comes with caring for each other. And, regardless of the sacred connection between ALL, how rare it is that we consciously practice this compassion with those whom we come into contact each day.

Allowing others to truly help - the surrender and vulnerability involved. There is great courage and grace in that. Most often we would choose to avoid this. It isn't until we are in a position where it is necessary that we come to a place of comfort with it (and maybe we don't come to a place of comfort). We have no other choice.

My Grandma - a gift to me for so much of my life - in her dying continues to give. She served as a beautiful mirror, if you will ... reflecting an irrational fear of mine. She helped me to see my tendencies to avoid relying on others, to perhaps shy from true closeness and connection. Most importantly, she taught me how sacred that really is.

A precious gift. Teaching acceptance, grace and compassion.
Thank You, Grandma

I'll close by adding the following:
* I would never give back the experience of being present to my grandma's dying process ... while difficult indeed ... I think there is more to learn than to fear!
* Asking for and accepting help not only seems to lift the one in need of help ... but perhaps even more the one(s) giving help.
* We are ALL on this human journey together. And yet, oh-so-unique (and seemingly separate) just the same. The later point is where compassion is key.
* Sometimes, help comes by honoring your own path, YOUR HIGHEST-SELF COUNCIL, if you will.
* I feel a sense of GRACE and heart-warming LOVE when contemplating (watching and experiencing) such universal human experiences from this 'all-encompassing' level. The "bird's-eye-view" / we-are-all-connected level, that is.


If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.
- Mother Teresa

Little Things (Dec. 8)

My husband and I had a great conversation last night that covered many-a-base ... but the overwhelmingly obvious gist of it was the reminder to place some focus on all those things in our day-to-day for which we are blessed and grateful.

The wondrous holiday season often brings with it some stresses ... be they travel-, schedule-, money-, gift-, diet- or relationship-related.

So ... today ... I feel pulled to send out this little reminder to us ALL:

Each day:
* pause, BREATHE, and be present to the moment - the day - that you are LIVING.
* perform a little mental inventory (or write it out) of all those things (big and small) for which you are truly blessed and grateful!

My short list:
*Healthy, happy child and family!
*Up-coming travel to spend time with more loved-ones (doesn't get much better!)
*Knowing and being GRATEFUL that ALL our basic needs are taken care of and then some!
*All the get-togethers that come with the season ... RICH in friendships :)

DONE.
Happy and Merry ...

Creative Juices ... (Dec. 2)

... are a-FLOWING!

Are you feeling this too?

In the last 24 hours, I have experienced a 'hat-trick' of the best, most creative, goose-bump-giving ideas from friends and acquaintances. Really "Divine-with-a-capital-D" ideas, if I may be so bold! Ideas that are so 'perfect' and authentic for the person sharing/presenting them.

Ah, the angels are singing.

I love being surrounded by such juicy creativity for a number of reasons.

One, it is mirroring the creativity that I'm feeling bloom inside me. (how nice is that?!)
Two, it serves to amp up this juicy feeling even more (YES!) ... allowing space for GREAT things to arrive.
Three, that genuine feeling of "way to go YOU," "you kick serious arse" support of others in their endeavors feels oh-so-'right,' and wonder-FULL.
Finally, all of the above make me think of, and marinate in, the exact opposite of scarcity! ...

... Creative ABUNDANCE for All, Baby!
Mmmmmm. Mmmm. Mmm!!

It's All Around Us (Nov. 18)

What you ask?
SUPPORT. It is all around us! (from friends, family, neighbors and The Universe, God, Source, Spirit itself!)

And, incidentally ... asking is key!

ASK - when you feel the need, or whenever!
NOTICE - always! (even when you haven't asked ... your awareness and attention to that which comes and goes in your day-to-day will surely highlight just how much support is there for the taking. Take some!)
FLOAT - What??? Ask. Awareness. And, then ... let go the kung-fu grip, for the love. (I say this as much for me as anyone ... with a knowing smile on my face) Float a bit. Relax. And, again ... notice / be aware.
RECEIVE - Yes, accept support! Take some! Welcome it with open and grateful arms! Ahhhhhhhhh!

A few lovely conversations, occurrences, messages to me brought this short and sweet message to light. Those things that brought this to the page, if you will. And, it is those things (and so much more) that I find uplifting, that I find SUPPORTIVE. Thank YOU ... LIFE!

And, in that beautifully wonder-ous way in which life speaks to us (when we're paying attention, that is) ... as I paused to make my tea before sitting down to type away, I read the quote on my tea bag tab. How perfect (read below)!

LIVE FOR EACH OTHER (goose bumps and tears to the eyes!)
Simple and Oh-so-Sweet, indeed.

Ask For, Notice, Accept (and Offer) SUPPORT.

LOVE.

Nov. 10 - Opening Up to Who You Are

Ahhhh, what a truly eye-opening month it has been! A truly wondrous month!
This getting honest/owning it thang is brilliant (when ready to do so ... no matter/no worries. I've played with all of these concepts many times before. For reasons I don't feel the need to analyze ... now was the time for me to go deeper with my experience of them (rather than just theory).)

When we look back on pieces (or the whole) of our journey ... I am struck by how we LIVE into our answers. We LIVE into Us, if you will. (what better way to learn than by living, hey?!)

When you peel away a few more ego layers ... the blinders! ...
When you peel away layers of falsehood (the self-sabotaging, you-getting-in-your-own-way, stuff) ... YOU BEGIN OPENING UP TO THE MORE AUTHENTIC, COMPLETE AND DIVINE YOU!

Kindly indulge me in continuing my personal story with "it all" ....

• Let's begin with the Ah-Ha! The awareness of my "getting in my own way" story! (note: be kind to yourself when here) "Oooooh, so that's why I'm experiencing the lack!"
• Opening next to the practice of 'watching my thoughts' and the diligent work of flipping "my story." Shifting Perspective!
• Continuing on with this powerful and worthy work. (It is work at first!) And, it's DAMN worth it! Mantras. Visualizations. Continued Awareness. Creating NEW stories and visions. Running energy. Continuing to OWN UP (with compassion). And .... OPENING UP to allow "the NEW" to arrive.

So then ... what starts to unfold is the influx of experiences and events that support my new story. And, it can happen fast ... as fast as you want to let it happen! (in tandem with the work to allow for its arrival ... both holding space for it by the above mentioned tactics (mantras, etc.) and the 'black and white' actions (like marketing my services and going cash-only with my finances, etc.) The ACTION is a key component indeed!)

What starts to show up are the wonder-full and wondrous 'rewards.'

Allow me to list a few ....

• Clients (and the loving of what I do!)
• Events/Talks and other writings and experiences that validate and confirm this road I am on. One such lovely event stands out -- my choice to attend Peter Hughes' vibe alignment at the Denver Metaphysical Research Society. It was a "speaking to the choir" night for me ... the topic and guidance provided was a direct confirmation of my chosen path over the last month.
• And, the most power-full (power-full to me) ... the true and unshakable realization that I merely need to ACCEPT and OPEN UP to WHO I ALREADY AM! It is such a calm and beautiful feeling. A knowingness. And, it seems to take care of it all ... the big picture, if you will.

Allow me to share the career aspect of what this looks like for me:

I've spent years working toward my life's passion by way of work/career. All the while simultaneously sabotaging it with my stories/my self-talk.

One of these sabotaging stories I covered in a recent blog -- how marriage and motherhood got in the way of how I used to do things/make things happen.

The other powerfully sabotaging story was the whole "who am I to be in a coaching role" story. That "I am not worthy" voice that is seemingly part of the human experience. (so you end up dancing around 'it' for years ... rather than living it. again, whatever 'it' may be for each of us)

It is NOW that I SEE ... It (career aspirations) isn't something to be working toward, so much as to OPEN UP TO! Who am I? About what am I passionate? When does my 'heart sing?' And, how may I best serve?

This passion for coaching, facilitating and supporting is what I have naturally done my entire life. It is who I am. In opening to this ... I can let Life, The Universe, God support me in LIVING IT. Living My Truth!

And, the support comes in many and varied and abundant ways .... whether experiences with clients, chosen workshops, further schooling, etc., etc., etc. Whatever my heart desires!

Though perhaps always just below the surface ... this opening up to 'who I am' feels gracious, and BIG, and humble and TRUE. (almost a "duh" aspect to it, too. smiles!)

Who Are You? Who are you today? Who are YOU always and in all ways?

LOVE!

Nov. 2 - Stay the Course (no effort ... magic!)

Stay the course, young Jedi! (wink)
After all, we are in warrior mode, aren't we?

And, allow me to start by giving my favorite definition of warrior (it has been tainted by our modern day concept of war)

war·ri·or (wôr-r, wr-) n.
1. One who is engaged in or experienced in battle.
2. One who is engaged aggressively or energetically in an activity or cause

Warriors engaged in our personal quest of self-management, toward a more divine, PERFECTLY-US day-to-day experience. Yeah ... something like that, right?! Smiles.

OK ... so now that's out of the way ... back to the topic at hand.
Staying the Course!

*We are AWARE of our story, our perspectives, our thoughts
*We are diligently working toward positively shifting our story, perspectives and thoughts
*We are OWNING UP to how our story, perspectives and thoughts DICTATE our experience

Doing the above requires some diligence and work, doesn't it?!

Today I'm feeling pulled to remind myself (to remind us) to stay the course, to stay on track. This is noble, important and power-full work in which to be engaged!
(by lifting one, we lift the whole)

So, when finding myself struggling with some of my daily practices ... flipping my story from negative to positive, visualizing, building and running mantras, managing my ego, running energy, etc. ... I remind myself of the following:

No Effort ... MAGIC!
Stop "Trying" ... instead ... Letting!

Yes ... continue the daily practice, the daily diligence, the new habit formation!
But, remind yourself to find more EASE with it. Remind yourself to get into the FLOW by trying the above mantras/self-talk. Let magic, wonder and acceptance (the "letting" bit) play a BIG role!

Still not feeling the flow?
Do not hesitate to shelf "it" (whatever your "it" may be) every now and again.
Put down the burden when it gets heavy.
Have a bit of fun. Play. Dance. Go out with a great friend. Take a hike.
You can always come back to "your work" later. (and, you'll more than likely return to it in a much better state in which to STAY THE COURSE!)

SMILES. LOVE.
And ... May The Force Be With You! ;)

Oct. 26 - Owning Up (taming that wild ego in the mix)

About my recent 'musings' ... I'm having a good, solid (and fruitful) "go" at owning my story and shifting perspective. Diligently catching myself in some patterns and choosing thought and action in order to SHIFT. It really is going quite nicely.


Alas ... there are times when the overactive and sneaky ego takes hold! (f-ing ego!! wink and smile) You'll know you're in one of these ego modes when you're looking to avoid, blame, be invisible, defend, defend, defend. (you get the idea)

They are squirmy times, indeed.

I found that instead of acting out of this uncomfortable state (essentially picking a fight ... because that is the likely outcome) I sat through it. I looked inward a bit deeper. I sought to understand myself and the origins of my "story." And, again ... I saw clearer the role I TAKE in how things play out.

Listen ... I'm not going to say that those significant others in our lives don't play any role in what we experience. But, truly ... we only have control over ourselves, our take on things, our thoughts, our actions. So, I'm starting from there. (To quote MJ ... I'm starting with the (wo)man in the mirror. wink)

Now, back to the above. By taking time to OWN even more of what I'm thinking, doing and experiencing in my day-to-day (well, really regarding my "challenge" topics) ... I'm finding the healing I seek. And, my ego isn't running away with the show anymore ... isn't sabotaging that which I'm working toward.

Get specific?!

OK. Let's parcel out my "can't make my career happen" story a bit.
Oh, and, let's choose the oh-so-loaded and fun (insert healthy sarcasm here) aspect of money as it relates to my story. I cannot tell you just how many times in the last couple years my thoughts went to the "I have no money" place ... how often they still do. How many times I would struggle over the "I need more clients" thoughts.
SO ... what do I experience? No money. Need more clients. (of course)

Now I'm playing with my thoughts. I'm messing with my ego ...
Every thought of lack from above - I remind myself to shift it/turn it around. Mantras baby! (Mantras are mantras ... me telling myself I am abundantly provided for is basically the same as me telling myself I need, I lack and it's not my fault ... but with HUGELY different results!)

Now, that isn't enough. I also finally realize that sticking to a budget is just as empowering and energetically power-full as taking full responsibility for all-else in ones life. I've stopped telling myself my "story" around why I shouldn't have to budget.
I'm on a cash-only basis right now. I've thought of doing it so many times (but ego got in the way). Now ... I'm doing it and it makes sense in ways I cannot put into words except to say that I'm truly honoring me in this process.

Finally, just like lovely life that I'd be looking at the website of a former teacher and come across one of his blogs on the topic of money (even though written in 2007) Brilliant! (included below should you care to read it) By the way, Peter Hughes conducts GREAT workshops at the Metaphysical Research Society in Denver!

Life, The Universe, God has a way of instantly, continuously and endlessly supporting us (no matter our "story!")

BIG LOVE!!

Staying in touch with cash flow
Posted by Peter Hughes on Thursday May 31, 2007


Recently I had a significant healing shift in my relationship with finances, money and spending. I transitioned from relating to money as something that moved out as quickly as it came in, to an understanding that money is a creative energy which, when honored and used with conscious intent, can be a magical and powerful tool.

In our home we have regular finance pow-wows where we schedule a time to meet with the intention to have a creative budget planning session. In the past these pow-wows usually turned into battlefields to work through our old stories and relationships around money. My old story was that money equals death and needs to move on as fast as possible. A zero balance in the check book was not only easy to balance but in my mind guaranteed a longer life. (That's a whole other story for another time.)

Each time we had set good intentions to stay within a budget we'd find, at the end of the month, we had spent more than we had generated for that month. There was no mystery, we just didn't honor our budget.

Several months ago, while revisiting our budget I was instructed by spirit not to resist honoring the budget we had agreed to implement. Where in the past my ego would go through a whole monologue about not wanting to be controlled, limited, blah, blah, blah, this time my ego was silent. Again, spirit said, "Do not resist." I felt there was something else in this for me other than implementing a budget, something bigger that I could not see, yet.

This particular month we created that we would only use cash for our household, grocery and discretionary spending. (We had recently replaced "allowance" with "discretionary spending" because we were relating to an allowance as a restriction, a punishment of sorts. Discretionary spending had a different sound, feel and vibration, much higher in fact.) We also made a connection about the use of cash and the absence of actually touching our money as it came to, through and from us. In these times of debit and credit cards the handling of cash is not nearly as much a part of our daily life as it used to be. We realized that by using our debit cards instead of cash we had become disconnected from cash flow in our lives. Understanding that money is energy, we saw how we had become removed from the energetic flow of cash. We had in fact become absent from a direct connection with the very thing we desired more of. Understanding that the definition of Insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results, we found we were more than willing to try something different.

The month began with enough cash on hand to support our household, groceries and discretionary spending for the first two weeks of the month. Midmonth we would withdraw the second half of the budgeted fund to support us for the remainder of the month. At month-end, if we had stayed in integrity, receipts and any remaining cash would total the allotted funds.

Much to our delight (and very much to my surprise) we found we were not only under budget for the month, but we were $700.00 under budget. We had actually spent less than we had budgeted. All this without feeling deprived or controlled.

To anyone with any financial training (my partner is a financial planner as profession) this result comes as no surprise. You spend less than you make (or as I put it, make more than you spend. It's less limiting and holds a higher vibration.) That's just common sense, no mystery. We'll it doesn't end here. I was reminded of what spirit had whispered in my ear a month earlier, "Do not resist, there is something here for you much bigger than you can see at this time."

I remembered during the second week of our new budget implementing practice, I had purchased some lunch while running errands. As I handed my discretionary spending cash to the cashier, I was stopped mid transaction by a very strong sense of absence. I took a breath and realized that for the first time in my life, consciously, I was experiencing no uneasiness or shame around money, and more specifically around making a purchase for myself. This was a defining moment for me and spirit made sure I took the time to connect with it and acknowledge the shift. This was the "something bigger" that spirit was talking about.

So, the second month of our new relationship with finances started out with a confidence and enthusiasm which I had never experienced before in regards to money. I was actually looking forward to seeing what surprises we would create this month. And then it hit, a string of breakthroughs that left us stunned. We had a series of Mondays like nothing I've ever experienced. The first Monday my partner received a 30% bonus payment from his employer. What a nice boost that was. The following Monday he received, from the same employer, a 30% raise in salary. How exciting is that? The next Monday we received word from our home insurance company that it was going cover the cost of replacing the roof on our home, a $14,000 home improvement project. Okay, didn't see that one coming. And, if that wasn't enough, the following Monday I received a check in the mail made out to me in the amount of $5,000, a gift. We now refer to that day of the week as "Cash Flow Monday."

Getting in touch with our cash certainly has paid off.

Speaking of which, we just paid off our credit cards and are going out to dinner to celebrate. We'll be paying with cash, of course.

Oct. 25 - True-to-Me Nutritional Tips

In my experience, both with my own health and that of my clients over eleven years of training, I find that I come back to TWO main points when it comes to optimal nutrition, feeling good, and maintaining a healthy weight.

Just TWO things.

1. Eat More REAL, NATURAL (perhaps organic) Foods.
(non-boxed. non-canned. non-highly-processed. non-GMO. How can you tell ... if the ingredient list is LONG and impossible to read because it looks like a scientific equation ... perhaps you leave it on the shelf)
Veggies, Fruits, WHOLE grains, natural meats! (Think RAINBOW when eating those veggies and fruits) Natural butter. Natural sugar/sweeteners. Natural/Quality Oils ... Olive, Grape seed, Coconut. It's confusing out there ... all the mixed messages! When feeling overwhelmed, just choose NATURAL foods. Our bodies are made to thrive on it. All the artificial *stuff* ... our bodies can't quite process it effectively and efficiently. (working toward improving your food choices ... please KNOW that the first two weeks are the most challenging. You're re-training your palate. Your body really does crave what you give it. SO, be diligent in the beginning! It will get easier. Soon, your body will be craving the healthier foods that used to feel like a challenge)

2. STRESS NOT / ENJOY WHAT YOU EAT.
(ah, this one is oh-so-much easier said than done) I will say this, then leave it up to you to find your less-stress zone. The more consistently you eat to lift, thrive, feel good (i.e. like #1 above), the less you'll over think every little thing you're eating. You'll eat to nourish and enjoy. You won't worry about the treats, indulgences, the parties, the BBQs, the desserts, or the highly processed foods. You won't worry or stress about most of it, BECAUSE you will more consistently choose great-for-you-and-your-body-and-mind foods. (I ask you ... if you are going to beat yourself up over eating a certain thing ... why are you eating it?)
[A personal note: a whole-food supplement I take (Juice Plus+) truly helps me to 'stress not!' Feel free to contact me about it should you be interested]

And ... though I only mention these two key points, watch for future posts on the topic of nutrition and FEELING GOOD.

To Our Good Health!

Oct. 21 - Shifting Perspective

If you read my last entry, you know I'm working toward better managing my thoughts. The first key step being AWARENESS, in order to then decide to shift the thinking!

So, I find myself contemplating the concept of PERSPECTIVE. Contemplating the concept of "changing my story." And, it reminded me of a 'blog-type' entry I wrote over a year ago.

I'll get right to it .....

(From May '09)
Perhaps you could indulge me as I write a bit from my life, a bit about what came to mind for me after my day:

After spending an 11.5 hour day with my lovely and oh-so-rambunctious 16-month-old little girl (I'm mainly a stay-at-home mama these days) ...
After having a good ol' chat with a great friend about the challenges and truly rewarding aspects of close relationships ...
After stepping outside to indulge in a sometimes weekly (sometimes monthly .. no matter) vice of having a cigarette on a beautiful. mild, summer-like night ...

I look up at the sky.
The first thing I see is the Big Dipper constellation.

I ask myself for what seems like the hundredth time .. how is it that I always see the Big Dipper first? And often, it's the only constellation I see.

The first thought was this ... it is what I know (not knowing much else about constellations in the sky)

The second thought(s) went something like this:
What do we CHOOSE to see? What do we allow ourselves to notice and/or focus upon?
You see, in the midst of a city environment, where the neighbor's bright and buzzing street-like lamp shines bright each evening (a source of angst at times), and after my conversation with my friend, and after my day with my daughter, I was again struck by how we see what we want to see. We see what we may be accustomed to seeing.
That is to say when we're not seeing with as much AWARENESS as we are certainly capable.

And so tonight, the Big Dipper, while familiar to me, served to shift my focus.

In the midst of this city environment, where my focus might sometimes be on that buzzing light, or on a 'challenging' day spent solely in the company of a 16-month-old (as amazing as she is, and as wonderful a TEACHER that she is) ... I can still look up and see stars. STARS! Even if not as bright as other times ... it brought a shift in focus indeed.

The wonder. The beauty. The immense-ness of this life.
And then there is US.
Our often obsessive thought a blip in the grand scheme of the AWEsomeness of the "big picture." And in the same breath ... how power-FULL and bright each of us IS in this grand scheme.
Really! How very much power each of us has in how we view and perceive our day to day.
How very much each of us creates.
How very much each of us affects 'the other."
How very much each of us ... when tapped into our hearts ... is tapped into the WHOLE.

Ah, it may seem cryptic. Though I don't think I could attempt to clarify without a good ol' face-to-face chat.
Regardless, my heart is warm as I put this into words that can't possibly due justice.

Suffice it to say ... I'm glad for the Big Dipper.
I'm glad for my family and friends.
I'm glad for the challenges (relationship, parenting, career, health, greater mindfulness .. to name a few that may resonate) that life brings, albeit most are made more so by our lovely and oh-so-overactive brains .
I'm glad we're all here together; Doing the best each of us can, and hopefully, at times, reminding ourselves that it is ONLY US that can choose where we want to put our focus and energy.

LOVE.
Julie
http://www.papillonlife.com/

**********************************************************************************
Though I dig all of this little blurb that pretty effortlessly poured onto the page ... it's the last line that I'd like to focus on today.

IT IS ONLY US THAT CAN CHOOSE WHERE WE WANT TO PUT OUR FOCUS AND ENERGY.

Yeah!!!
And, how beautifully power-FULL that really is ... because as pondered last week, our focus determines our experience.

And given this ... Don't you think some good ol' diligent "work" and discipline is warranted?! (to first be aware of our thoughts/story ... and then, to work toward positively shifting our thoughts/story to bring about a more Perfect-for-Us experience?)

I'm going to answer not just with a YES, but a Hell-Yes!

A few ideas re: the work/discipline for Awareness:
*Journal
*Quiet Time
*Book and pen next to your bed for those late night musings (or late night obsessions)
*A BOAT-load of compassion, self-care, non-judgement!
*Ease Up / LAUGH

A few ideas re: the work/discipline for Affecting Positive Shift:
*Write out your NEW ("perfect") story
*Vision Board / Mind-Mapping
*Mantras, Mantras, Mantras - turn every "old/no-longer-useful" thought into your NEW THOUGHT
*A BOAT-load of compassion, self-care, non-judgement!
*Ease Up / LAUGH

OK ... Enough Already! wink and smile.
GREAT THINGS ARE ON THE HORIZON!!!

LOVE and SMILES.

Oct. 15 - What's Your Story?

Ah, the stories we tell ourselves!

By "story," I am referring to that which you tell yourself (about anything in your life).
The more-often-than-not unconscious narrative that powerfully determines what you experience in your day-to-day.
The story that you unconsciously use to continually validate the story itself. Funny how cyclical it is. Ah, our truly brilliant, highly functional unconscious minds! (wink)

We all have aspects of our life (relationships, money, career, family, general state-of-being, etc.) in which "our story" is wreaking havoc. But interestingly and perfectly, our story is always playing out exactly as we wish, exactly as we see it. It's our "work" to determine what story we're telling ourselves ... and what experience is thus playing out.
(there's no judgement on whether the narrative is "positive" or "negative" It is what it is. And, it plays out accordingly.)

So, yesterday ... the observer in me caught myself in one of my recurring stories. A story that I've perfected and strengthened when I became a wife and mother. The later giving it lots of extra fuel!

The cool thing is that I've been chipping away at it for some time ... using nothing more than awareness. (beautiful awareness!) And, yesterday felt as if my awareness reached a sort of 'critical mass,' if you will. The light is shining so bright that I SEE. Definitely an "Oooooh, that's what I'm doing" moment! And, an "Oooooh, I do have the "power" realization.

I began my day saying to myself "See! ... this is exactly what I've been talking about ... how am I supposed to ________________ (fill in the blank)"

It was but a second or two after the above self-talk that I stopped in my "mind-tracks" and had my "Ooooooh" moment(s).

I LOVE these types of moments!
When you can detach from your ego a bit ... these moments allow you to SEE and OWN how your life is playing out. AND, perhaps even more beautiful is that these moments open your eyes to your true limitless potential. I SEE myself. And, I AM A-OKAY. And, I CAN determine and create my experience. (I already do NOW!)

So, what was my story?
A healthy narrative of "see how many things get in the way of my creating a successful career, for the love!" (blame, blame, blame, blame, blame)

Hmmmm ... time to re-write (re-wire) my narrative!!

When I caught myself in my story ... I quickly realized how great I do have it. And, I quickly realized that I can change aspects of my story to create the Perfectly-Me narrative/experience. A kick-ass combo of all the roles I play and love in this life of mine!

What's my NEW story?
*I'm grateful for my abundant life ... as wife, mother, friend, trainer and coach, etc.
*I am good at these roles. And, when owning it and being fully present to them ... I am GREAT at them. (me at my best!)
*I am successfully creating the work-life balance that is Perfectly-Me.
*I am healthful and weathful TODAY. (I really am! Because as eluded to above .... when I woke up to THE MOMENT ... I realize that I AM OKAY RIGHT NOW! And I realize the limitless power of MY STORY ... because I get to tweak and perfect and create and love along the way)

My "Work" ... daily check-in and 'recalibration' of my narrative! ACTING on it! OPENING up to whatever comes! (and all over again and again ...)

I'm off to marinate in my "Am-ness"
And, to re-create MY STORY. SMILES!

What's Your Story?

August 11 - Careful Observance

It's time for more of it! Careful observance of my attitude and thoughts, that is.

This isn't a new idea for me. Merely a time where I'm again reminded that MY attitude and perceptions ... 'the story' that I tell myself ... is unbelievably POWER-FULL!

Oooooh, so it IS time to give some attention and energy to seeing all the ways in which life is working for me, is wonderfully-wonderful, is co-conspiring with me!

That last little bit is KEY.

Life co-conspires when my outlook is that of lack, frustration, etc.
Life co-conspires when my outlook is that of wonder, flow, happiness, little victories, etc.

Incidentally, this very topic is largely why I embarked upon this blog.
You see, naturally/historically my outlook has been one of happiness, lightness, play (not that there aren't a few self-sabotaging blocks in there ... I mean come-on, how boring!? wink!)

So, the idea is to be more mindful and watch/observe my attitude and thoughts. Observe those less-than-ideal mental rants. I do not speak of a bad day, a bad moment, a less-than-lovely way of handling a situation; I speak of PATTERNS. When I notice I've been in a state or space of lack or frustration for longer periods. THIS is when I think it's important to not only get logical, methodical, action-oriented with respect to making positive-for-me change ... but also time to WATCH and OBSERVE the story I tell myself.

Okay, so now I'll have more clarity about my sabotaging stories. Then what? Hmmmmm ...

Commit to better supporting ME and my interests so as to again spend more regular time in an inspired state of mind.

AND, I think I'll throw a little pity-party bon voyage! I'm going to get ritualistic about it! (maybe I'll dance, sing, burn, laugh, cry ... perhaps all, who knows! I do know I want to FEEL the letting go! Decadent, huh!?!)

Say THANK YOU and GOOD-BYE to the 'what is wrong with my life' stories.
THEY NO LONGER SERVE ME (as if they ever did).

August 10 - Multiple Personalities?

From one day to the next ... the pendulum swings :)
Really though, do you ever get the sense that the ups and downs are a bit more intense than other times?

Yesterday ... ho hum, challenging, long.
Today, everything feels great, despite the fact that my car didn't start this morning and I had to reschedule a client because if it (plus, the day is flying by).

In these "great" stages I'm thankful that I have clarity around the dichotomy of it all.

I entertain, for a moment, the "I'm a bad Mom" story ... because clearly I'm having a better day today because I'm getting a break from Mom-hood, and I don't have to negotiate every little power-struggle-transition of the day. (we're in Ruby "terrible-two" mode)

But then, I rise a bit higher. I find my heart and truth in the mix.

* I AM feeling good because I don't have to negotiate all the 'my-way-or-the-highway' stuff (incidentally, both Ru and I have to own this).
* I am feeling both wonderfully-optimistic-excited AND will-it-get-here-already-for-the-love about working more in October.
* I am NOT surprised that this phase of life has felt challenging (given me and my demeanor) and instead choose to look at it as validation of my strengths and passions, of who I am.
* I know the polar-opposite pendulum swing (aka. multiple personalities / I-feel-crazy-because-of-the-swing ) will level out again with the better-for-me balance coming

But hey ... talk to me tomorrow, I just may feel like life is HARD again. Getting through!

And, for today ... I LOVE It (ALL)

And Today: Thank you to Heather, Roland, Jon, Flo (though she doesn't even know why)

Again, LOVE Life!

July 30 - What a Difference a Day Makes

Yesterday was an oh-so-much better day than our Wednesday.

After the smoke clears (from the fire-breathing moods, that is) it truly makes me feel good that I do know why we have those dark days ... because I KNOW me so well. (this wasn't always the case) And the "why" is pretty important for awareness and conscious change.

AND, an even more recent discovery (and thus work done and to be done) is truly allowing myself to go to the dark places and BE SEEN there. Share. Vent. (throw the tantrum, right?!)

Now, clearly there are better and more appropriate-for-all ways to throw a good ol' fit (i.e. NOT in front of your 2 year old unless you want them to follow suit. Alas, we're human.) But, I'm clear that "throwing it" in a more constructive way is the best way to MOVE THROUGH IT (to quote a great friend!). To honor where you are ... even if "UGLY"

And after my deep breathing (smiles) ... I was reminded of my previous blog entry. (I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you.) Helps, too, in Moving Through.

What I KNOW about Me and My Daughter:
* We are both energized by and seekers of social interaction. True people-people!
* Four+ days of quarantine and little activity (due to fever and cold) does not suit either of us.
* Sketch-ville ensues after too much of the quarantine because of point #1.
* This IS what it IS
* I welcome other social-butterfly ideas for getting through these periods (coloring, movies, games. What else?) :)

So yesterday ... Ruby hung with her pre-school friends for a bit. I got out and volunteered at a cool new start up school for girls. G and I had a great-convo date night last night.

And imagine that ... all is right with my world. Ha!

An oh-so-simple adage keeps floating through my brain: Know Thyself!
And then, more importantly, ACT.
Move more freely and often in the direction of YOUR HEART, regardless of what you tell yourself life as a Mom/Dad/Family/Sibling/Daughter/Son/Sig. Other is "supposed" to look like. This is my work still to be done. Ongoing, I think ...

Love and Respect. For Us First. Which gives us the capacity to extend to OTHERS.

I'll end with the ingenious little quote Tut (the universe) had for me and others today:
"Most would never admit it, or they hide it from themselves, but everyone can sense God within.

And once admitted, they can sense God in others.

Go for it!
The Universe"

July 28 ... ARGH!

So this particular blog isn't about gratitude (other than a few choice ones, which I'll get to later).
Rather ... this blog is born of serious angst and needing to VENT.

Stay at Home Mom!
I'm going to say it ... other than a very few special people, I think SAHM is likely one of the most unbalanced and not-so-healthy-for-anyone roles to play. And, terrible twos ... why is it that I (ME) am acting more like a terrible two than my ingenious little push-every-button-in-me daughter?!! Grrrrrrrrr!

Seriously, EVERY job I've ever held in my almost 4o years (and some were demanding as hell) have been ultimately 'easier,' and so I feel I was better at them. Not to say I'm a horrible mom. I do get it/understand. Rather, a mom having a horrible (want to ship my daughter to China for a year) day!

GRRRRRRRRRRR again! Vent almost over ... I think. (wink)
Give me a minute ... Deep Breathing.

Now ... Here are my related gratitudes:
* That I have a beautiful and beautifully smart daughter to get on my every last nerve!
* That I have a night out tonight! Whew!
* That Ruby's no longer sick/feverish so she can go back to 'preschool' tomorrow ... YES!
* That my career/home-life balance IS happening, IS coming, IS on it's way ... I can FEEL it. THANK heaven for this!!!
* That everyone in my little family will feel better as we manage future days like this one with a bit more grace (BECAUSE there will be more balance in MY life)
* That so many other aspects of life will FEEL better as a result of better balance as well. This is huge. This is the crux, as they say. (what in the hell is a crux anyway?)

Off to move and SHAKE this feeling out ... it's VISCERAL, damn it!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!

July 7 - New "Rules"

OK ... so it has become abundantly clear that while I'm feeling more mindful, more 'in the flow' (i.e. trusting the day to day, trusting the process) ... It does not come easy to write each day. And, in fact, I feel that it takes away from sharing/writing from that place of authentic inspiration. So ... from here forward ... I'll be blogging when PULLED to do so. I used to find myself writing little blurbs weekly. We shall see.

Ahhhhhhh. That feels good!

And, for today I want to share something that a wonderfully-beautiful connection of mine (Pierre!) shared with me months ago. I then came across it again via another wonderfully-beautiful connection (Kelly!). I love life this way!

(google: joe vitale ho'oponopono)
Here's the simple gist of this ancient Huna concept:
Take FULL responsibility for everything that shows up in your life. EVERY THING. (so powerfully validating and freeing!)
THEN, when you don't particularly enjoy what IS .... instead of denying it, pushing it away, getting angry, frustrated, etc. INSTEAD ... contemplate on it with the following 'mantra,' give it your presence: " I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you."

If you think about it a bit. Getting yourself into this state of humble acceptance around a challenging circumstance will disengage you/it. Will free you up. Will allow you to be exactly where you ARE with no denial ... RATHER ... ready to move to the next moment from a place of true PEACE. I can only imagine the power in this!

Like many-a-lesson in this crazy-cool life ... I'm off to PLAY a bit. That's often my commitment to myself. Play with a concept that resonates. See what happens. Can't hurt!! (cuz I tend to choose "can't hurt" concepts with which to play. wink. That's key! smiles!)

BIG LOVE.

July 1

Interesting day.

Nice to have slept in ... all three of us!
And, nice, too, to have Guillermo working from home so that we could bike to lunch.

Guillermo and I picked up Ru from 'school' together (also nice) ... and got a pretty quick taste just how tired the little girl must have been. Emotions running high. We all managed a chill pre-bedtime routine. And then witnessed one of her best meltdowns ever. Poor thing.

We just peeked in at her once asleep and she looks peaceful as can be (and she looks like my Mom). Ahhhhhhh.
Off to bed for all.

Gratitudes:
* The Ride!
* Oh yeah ... and a network that is seemingly 'meant to be' (I have 'that' feeling)

Good Night.
Love.

June 30 - Networks

Warm and Lazy day.
Morning at the park and lunch with Guillermo. Mmmmmm ... Indian/Nepalese food!

Afternoon - LAZY.
Playing in the shade with water and sidewalk chalk :)

The night brought another networking opportunity with neighbor (a Pilates instructor)
I am aware and GRATEFUL for just how many networking opportunities are popping up! Nice.

GRATITUDES:
* Chill day with Ru
* Networks!
* Evening out at Duo (love that place!)
* My flyers printed and ready for drop off (cross-marketing and referrals ... bring it on!)

Love.

June 29 - Gratitudes

Yep ... right to it. :)

*People! (the "good" and the "bad") What better way to learn and grow then by interacting with others! (AND ... it's SO MUCH MORE-SO the closer those people are to you. Sheeeeeesh!)
*Taking stock in myself and my strengths and my interests. Such a good reminder to MOVE in those directions.
*Guillermo and Ruby
*Extended FAMILY and FRIENDS (I am oh-so-abundantly-fortunate!)

Goal for this week:
Impart an aspect of FUN and PLAY into every thing I do. Now that's a challenge! Game ON!

Here's to It!
Love!

June 28 - Monday

We had a good day today :)

Ru and I ran errands and stopped off at two parks this morn. We saw some of our regular park-people ... always nice for Ru and for me.

Naps.
Downtime.
Bit o' house straightening.
Nice dinner at home with G and Ru.

Off to bed early. Also NICE.

Good Night!

June 27 - A Weekend Well-Lived

This weekend in the mountains was full of fun-for-all-of-us activities ... and beautiful weather to support it!

Each day brought ...
swimming, parking-it with Ru, hiking, biking and good ol' down time while Ruby napped.

I got back on the Winter Park mtn biking trails ... first ride of the season! BEAUTIFUL (albeit a bit challenging at times ... lung buster!) A great ride for the first ride.

GRATITUDES:
*Mtn (dense forest) single track trails!
*The fresh smell of pine, and the sun peeking through the trees.
*Ruby having a blast (and tiring herself out!)
*Down-time with Guillermo (though we could definitely use more one-on-one time!)
*A beautiful Sunday ... with a stop-you-in-your-tracks beautiful dusk drive home

In bed by 9:45 to start the week right :)

Love!

June 26 - Mountains!

It seems almost blasphemous to be on a computer in the mountains, for the love! So ... right to it again ...

GRATITUDES:
* We took a fun (and informative) detour through Idaho Springs on our way up to Winter Park ... spontaneous-great!
* Guillermo-made yummy dinner
* Waking up in the mountains ... SUN!
* Park, Pool and Play, Play, Play with Ru
* Biking and Hiking on gorgeous mtn. trails next to a SWELLING river. LOVE it!
* Another oh-so-yummy Guillermo-made dinner
* Watching the last of the sun kiss the mountains.

A day well spent ...

Good Night!

June 25 - Oooh, out of habit

So I woke up this morning (early but rested) and realized that I hadn't blogged. It's all-too-easy to get out of the habit of just about anything - even if it's something you enjoy. Humans! We're funny.

With that said ... I'm getting right to it!

GRATITUDES:
* Great conversations with friends ... and their divine timing!
* OWNING your shite! We all have those things we could improve upon. And, the ego-blow of 'owning up' is palpable - yes! ... but I wouldn't have it any other way (perhaps I'm a bit of a glutton for growth opportunities. And, I can honestly say ... I'm good for a while. wink!)
* BEING where I am. And, finding deep and trusting resolve (this is a knowingness ... it's there ... DEEP down)
* Weekend in the mountains ... coming right up!
* Ru playing in water fountains and watching the crazy and talented "Pirate Ann" at the library.
* Fun To-Do's (that I'll begin while in mtns) - Marketing/Network Plan // Vision Binder // Calendar for G and I
*Growing friend and colleague network!

Monday and Tuesday .... Let the calls begin!

May I remember to blog again tomorrow!
Big Love.

June 23 - HOME ... and another fresh start

Ah, Home! Though vacations sure are wonderful ... there's something special about coming home.

I'm choosing, too, to use this home-coming as yet another 'start' for those things I'd like to change, manifest, live.

Here's the short list:
1. Live by my weekly budget plan again - oh-so-helpful when I plan and abide by it (this always becomes a top priority after vacation, right?!)
2. Make it happen and BELIEVE on the career front (bit more complicated than that ... but cut me a bit o' slack, I'm coming off of vacation mode. wink. more details when feeling centered on the topic)
3. ENJOY summer ... days of the week with Ru, weeknights and weekends with the fam and friends! We're poised to do just that with every other weekend in the mountains!
4. Eating for more optimal health and mood (also a post-vacation priority. wink and smile. ah, how I love life balance!)

Gratitudes:
*Family
*Friends
*Lake Country (aka. Wisconsin ... more specifically Lac du Flambeau chain of lakes)
*Vacations
*Coming Home

Finally ... I'm OH-SO-GLAD to be writing my daily gratitudes again! The mindfulness itself (while in the moment) is pretty damn precious. And, I do that more when I'm writing each eve.

Thank You!
Love and Good Night!

June 14 - Eve of Vacation

Today was smooth. And, we're ready for our week-long vaca in Wisconsin! Family, friends and down-time :)

This morning, Ru and I trained Flo at the gym (smiles) then ran a bunch of errands.
Miss Shannon was able to help out for a few hours this afternoon while I went to a job interview and packed up our suitcase for the trip. All and all a no-stress day. Nice!

Job interview: Though not a good fit or a good feel, I'm glad for the process of it all. First interview in 3 + years.

GRATITUDES:
* Smooth Day!
* Great chat with Katie.
* Biked to pick up Ru from Miss Shannon's (the afternoon was sunny and warm)
* Yummy and healthy dinner with the fam.

Off to bed soon-ish ... all prepped for our early departure.
Very much looking forward to seeing friends and family ... and Ru spending time with them all!

LOVE.

June 13 - Mellow

We woke up to the sight of big fluffy snowflakes out our windows this morn.; after a good nights sleep. A mellow morning (appropriately so given the cold weather outside)

Ru was not feeling well this afternoon. Feverish at times (which means LOW energy). Happily ... she began feeling better a couple hours before bedtime. I hope it's behind her ... for many-a-reason, one of which is our leaving for WI to visit family and friends on Tuesday. Here's to a healthy Ruby!!!

GRATITUDES:
*snow in mtns (though we look forward to summer activities next time we're in Winter Park)
*GREEN Colorado due to so much moisture
*breakfast and rec. center swimming pool with Allison, Olivia and Tyler
*Ruby feeling BETTER!

We're all tired and ready for sleep.
Sweet Dreams.

June 10 - 12 Down-Time

This week and next bring beautiful and happily-anticipated bouts of down-time and vacation!
(which is why I haven't blogged) Even down-time from a truly beneficial practice such as this is welcome for the renewed focus, renewed 'lens' it offers.

GRATITUES:
*More clarity on next steps re: career (even if clarity comes through what you don't want)
*Misty clouds and fog over Berthoud Pass
*FRESH PINE smell, FRESH mtn air!
*Family time - to chill, laugh, move (get out there)
*Evening thunder storms!
*SUN peeking through :)

Happy Days.
Love.

June 9 - Tired

Tired today.

G and I find ourselves poised to gain much / learn much / grow ... with/if a healthy input of love and effort. Sounds nice and fluffy, doesn't it? Alas, it's challenging and pushes both our buttons.
Last night found us not hearing each other so well ... happens all-too-often in just a couple 'tough-for-us' areas. Keep on, Keeping on!

More later.
Now ... just plain tired and a bit sad. I want gather a few thoughts so as to come back around (keeping on) from a more compassionate and receptive place.

On a goofy up-note:
* Found that I adore the main character from 'Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs' - Flint Lockwood ... ah, some of these kid-flicks are great!

Other GRATITUDES:
* Made a cool new acquaintance at the park today (I do this often. I love this. I believe that's why "I do this often." smiles)
* Mini date night tonight ... good and necessary to chill and connect with Guillermo (due to work circumstances, we haven't done so in 2 weeks now)
* Looking forward to catching up with Katie!
* MOUNTAIN weekend ahead! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
* GOING FOR IT re: one particular job (feel the old sense of "oh yes .. it will be mine") wink and smile.

LOVE.

June 8 - New Commitment

Today was a great mix of "work" and down-time. (I place work in quotes because much of my chosen work these days doesn't feel like work at all ... I really enjoy it. That's the continued goal! And, I know for me a big component for happy work-life is INTERACTION with people ... especially if I can play off of/gain inspiration from a colleague or two!)

Which makes the next piece of my day so great! ...
First Juice Plus+ health talk went great. I'm oh-so-glad for the collaboration with Julie. Two talks per month! Nice to have some of that inspiration back!

Plus a training session and lunch with Mdmse Flo!

And, a hike in the foothills followed by a meandering visit to a store (decadence, I tell you!)

Gratitudes:
*More leisurely morning with G in the mix
*Health Talk (and more to come)
*KNOWING I want to do more wellness plans, too
*Beautiful, almost misty/foggy views of the hogback from red rocks trails
*Ru and I grabbing a coconut popsicle on our way home from Miss Shannon's
*The feeling of a productive day WITH exercise and relaxation
*Feeling MORE BALANCED, indeed!

Plus, thinking of a couple people today.
Cathleen ... sending some lovely vibes your way!
Katie ... SMILES galore. Happy and excited to share in yours and Drew's big day!

Sweet Dreams.
LOVE.

June 6 and 7 - Relaxation and Occupation

Sunday was such a relaxing day. With Guillermo still working his migration, and Ruby being a bit low energy ... we spent the whole morning hanging out at the house. We finally headed out for a quick bike-trip to the grocery store at Noonish.

Sunday eve was spent with friends at the season's first Jazz in the Park. It was a big group. And, always oh-so-nice to hang out with friends and acquaintances. GREAT to see Noe, too, after so much time! Ruby scored many-a-choc.-covered-strawberry from Noe! :)

Monday was a perfect mix of work and play (with a bit o' relaxation as well)

Great morning clients (with Ru in the mix)
Book Exchange play date
Completed a client whole-life wellness plan (LOVE writing them!)

And, for the first time since last Monday ... we all had dinner together on the back patio. Guillermo's migration is successfully complete! Nice!

GRATITUDES for the days:
*great friends ... Jon and Flo!
*seeing Noe!
*G and Ruby reading bedtime stories on the couch!

Big Love!

June 5 - Saturday

Another warm, summery day!
Ru and I opted to go to the Highlands Farmer's Market this morning (by bike ... makes the day so much more enjoyable, if you ask me).
We had a great time! Bluegrass music. Fresh produce. Apple turnover. And, jumpy castle!

This girl can jump and jump and jump! So much fun to watch kids having so much fun.
Then, we hula hooped. A morning well-lived.

Evening:
Thankfully ... Guillermo was able to steal away from his weekend-migration to do dinner with us. We miss him!

Gratitudes:
*All of our time at the farmer's market.
*FRESH veggie-filled salad (almost a rainbow of colors)
*Our lohi/sunnyside/highlands neighborhood ... Home.
*Live music!
*Ru and G
*The evening sky - thunderhead clouds with the sun shining bright upon them (with pink and blue sky) plus the smell of rain. (though no real rain to speak of. Ah, Colorado ... dry, dry. Our poor vegetation and skin, for that matter!)
*Rain when it's sunny

Sweet Dreams.

June 4 - SUMMER

Today's weather brought sunshine and heat (90ish degrees) - a solid taste of full-on summer!

Ru and I headed to the outdoor pool for the first time this season. A skinned knee cut the swimming short, but we had a great time hanging outside at the pool and nearby park all morning. And, ice cream to top it all off.

Tonight, back to the park (by bike which felt good to me) ... then hung out on the couch and watched a bit of Wall-E before Ru went to bed without complaint (mostly. wink.)

We miss Guillermo (working a migration has kept him BUSY late into the evenings)

Gratitudes:
*Ru's truly happy, larger-than-life demeanor ... her smile. her laugh.
*Waking up 'naturally' ... Ru's been sleeping until almost 8 for 2-to-3 days!
*Working on a client wellness plan during Ruby nap ... feels good!
*Health presentation gigs SURE to come. Collaborations are such a great thing! And, even more tangible is the feeling of optimism around job/career again! Ahhhhh.
*The three kids (teens) who told me that my purse fell out of our bike trailer while coming home. THANK YOU!
*More and more Ruby hugs :)

LOVE.

June 3 - Inspirations, New Connections

Today brought a continuation of inspired thought and great connections to go with it!

Gratitudes!
*Chill, sleep-in morning ... Ru and I taking our time as we start our respective days
*Flo and I continued talking 'big picture ideas and LIFE' while on a great, challenging and beautiful hike
*Met with a new client .... Love, Love, Love doing whole life wellness plans!
*Met a wonderful new colleague, peer, rock-star nutritionist ... the kind of connection that seems pretty darn divine (and our initial meeting was 'coincidental' (aka. divine))
*Love picking up Ru from Miss Shannon's. We made a quick store run, then played in the back yard, ate our dinner outside, bath time and books.

What a lovely day!
Sweet Dreams ...

June 2 - Small Treasures

Two of my greatest gratitudes for today ...
*holding Ruby's hand while walking to grab a coffee
*Ruby climbing up on my lap just to sit

Now, if you know Ruby ... you'd understand that these are things for which to be grateful no matter what. But so much more-so when you consider that Ru is quite the independent little woman. Holding hands? Sitting still - at all? Not so much the norm. :)

June 1

Ever NOTICE how much you want to change 'something?' Doesn't really matter what that something is ... it's more the "wanting to change" that I'm aware of today.

Why this awareness?

Because I had a really great day! I had some unexpected free time in the morning ... so I moved, danced a bit, worked-out. I worked a really nice client session. Then, I spent the rest of my afternoon hiking and hanging out with one of my best and longest friends. Followed by a nice evening with my crazy-smart and goofy daughter. SO - for all those things I AM grateful. Truly.

And still ... I sit and ponder the 'what else's' ... the 'things that are missing' ... the 'how can I make that happen' ... and so on. Hmmmmm - isn't that interesting!?! (wink) And, a bit sad. (but honest)

THINGS to CONTINUE
*authentic gratitude for those lovely little every-day things.
*saying YES to more of what IS.
*keep adding in those things that LIFT, make me shine, make me happy, giddy, smile!
*keep talking, telling, writing, dreaming ... getting in the "feeling space" of my soon-to-be accomplishment(s). What I'll be living with my soon-to-be career addition :)
*Do It ... apply, network, ASK.

And as I sign off ... I feel a twinge of doubt. (Blasted doubt!) A twinge of 'full of shit-ness.'
I'm still in the above "how can I change it" state. It is what it is, right at this moment.
Alas ... thankfully, there are many-a-moment :)

Truth. Love.

May 31 - Remembering

Ah, what a weekend!

TIRED ... the great kind of tired.
Much time was spent biking around with fam. and friends. Two yoga classes ... one of which was Yoga Rocks the Park in Denver (Flo ... you yoga diva, you! It was great, beautiful, challenging and jamming - with the African drums and all!!) And, of course enjoying a beer or three with friends for evening BBQing.

We have GREAT 'new' friends for which I feel most thankful.
Memorial Day - a beautiful time to REMEMBER just how lucky we are!

LOVE.

May 30 - Yoga and BBQ take II

Yoga Rocks the Park & Neighborhood BBQ and movie night ....

We look forward to the afternoon ahead.
Morning and Mid-day spent relaxing a bit in preparation for our bike ride to Yoga, our bike ride home and our evening BBQ with neighbors and friends.

We're digging our new neighbors!

Happy Holiday Weekend.
LOVE.

May 29th - Yoga and BBQ

Day one (full day that is) of our holiday weekend ...

* Great and challenging yoga class
* Oh-so-fun-for-ALL-of-us BBQ at sister of a friend's house. Thank You, Jon! We all had a blast :)

Tomorrow: Yoga and BBQ take II

May 28 - Eve of a Holiday Weekend

Three days to spend with family and friends ... and there isn't any rain in the forecast!
That's something for which to be grateful.

Also ...
* pure possibilities
* biking to the park with Ru and seeing MANY-a-friend. Ah, warm weather days!
* Ru's "drink tub" baths on the back patio (pool had a hole!)
* blue skies and GREEN grass (spring in CO)
* pending biking, hiking and bbq-ing to come!

Love and Enjoy!

May 27 - Reminders

Yet again, this practice / this blog is serving as a really nice reminder to QUIET my thoughts a bit. To BREATHE consciously. To accept days where perhaps 'high-energy' inspiration is less prevalent ... but the opportunity to pause and check-IN is available.

And, what a nice day for it. Fun at a friends b-day party last night .. makes for a lower energy day today. And when I have 'extra' time, I am struck by how often we can fill it with activities that do nothing to FILL. (rather to deplete) So ... off with the computer and TV and no phone. Time to truly CHILL and RELAX.

First ... GRATITUDES ...
* Reminding myself to pause, breathe, half-smile and simply BE where I am.
* Coming back to my phone after working with clients to two great voice mails - my brother, and an old and dear friend. Made MY day!
* Seeing that I have a follower ... Sister Sars!
* Healthy Ruby!
* Beautiful email/newsletter from Kelly Canul ... with a perfectly-timed REMINDER to Let Go. Tune IN. Trust. ACT.
* Some time with Guillo tonight.

Half-Smile.
BREATHE.

May 26 - All is Well

Feel good today.
So, does Ru ... despite a runny nose (chronic in toddlers, for the love).
She's been in a chill/'lovey' mode today. Such a treat! This little girl is most typically going mach-80 x's 50. (wink) (but ask anyone who knows her ... I speaketh the truth)

The weather is beautiful!
Ru is napping.
I'm blogging.

This afternoon we'll do a store bike-about. Then, a mini b-day gathering for a friend.

All IS Well.

I feel more settled than yesterday, too. My conversation with Guillermo is helping to this end.
Ride out the changes. TRUST THE PROCESS.

I'll keep "getting out there" (whether by networking or resume-sending or marketing) And, today I feel more trusting about what will surely come my way (our way).

Happy Hump Day, Everyone!
Love.

May 24/25 - WINDS

So Monday was a WINDY one here in Colorado!
It was a good day, but I found myself suffering from comparison with the weekend days. I found myself a little bored.

So, I gots to thinkin' (again) (wink) And, it seems my thinking was right in tune with the gusty wind. A bit all over the place. Whipping from here to there.

So here is some of what is coming up:

I'm clear that I strive for more home/work balance. This is a large part of why I begun this practice of trying to be more mindful and grateful for ALL aspects of this life! So, a good REMINDER to do just that ... Be Present to What Is. Wake Up to ALL that IS.

Also, I spoke on Sunday of filling ones' day-to-day with more of those things that bring LIFT and JOY and HAPPINESS. For me, this means 'occupation' by way of leisure activity (the family, friend connection and nature), which is why I had such a BEAUTIFUL weekend!

Now I find myself in the traditional work week. And it is "occupation" by way of career that comes to greater light.

This is the area where I feel most whipped, whirled and tossed around. What direction to go? Feeling a pull to a few things. WINDY, indeed!

So, this staying aware and present thing serves beautifully here, too! But, I keep coming back to what feels like a truth for me right now. Something said (by a couple people) that's really sinking in.

(If I may paraphrase) It is in the 'engaging,' the 'jumping in and living' that we actually live.

To me, that translated nicely into the idea of "LEARNING BY LIVING!" (which incidentally, I'm really damn good at!) To me, it makes me realize how in the striving for balance ... I'm finding more striving. Me thinks it's time for a bit more doing/jumping-in. (wink) Time to just START ... somewhere. (the time for perfecting the vision will come)

I find it funny to be having this conversation with myself ... the one who usually jumps in, and jumps in fast! Ah, how the rules of the game really have seemed to change for me now that Mama is one of my roles. AWARENESS, right?!

So, Here's to LIVING (each moment of each day). Here's to BEGINNING ... something!

gratitudes:
*Me
*My Life and those Lovely People In It with Me
*Beautiful ABUNDANCE!

LOVE.

May 23 - Beautiful Day, Take II

I think that this "happy" thing is a wonderful combo of many-a-thing ... not the least of which is one's good ol' ATTITUDE!

And, the "other thing(s)" that greatly contribute to keeping a better attitude! ... figuring out what they are for you. Taking notice of when you feel an 'easy' sense of joy, contentment, purpose, passion. What are you doing? How are you 'being?' And, then, being mindful to include those things more often into your days!

This weekend hit home on many things in this lovely life that make ME feel happily ALIVE.

*The beautiful outdoors! NATURE! Sunshine, Warmth, Trees, Wind, Mtns, Flowers
*Activity! Movement! Biking, Hiking ... being outdoors 85% of the day
* Family and friends, laughing!

I hope all of you had as beautiful a weekend ... or better!
LOVE!

May 22 ... Beautiful Day

Really ... I could list the whole day, and all the moments that made it, as my daily gratitudes.

*Quality (and quantity) time with Guillo and Ru
*Biking everywhere
*Gorgeous summer-like day
*Live Jazz music
*Happy, healthy family now ready for bed.

Ah, THANKS!
LOVE.

May 21

Friday with my Ru ...

Today's Gratitudes:
*Park-time at a beautiful Littleton park ... Ru bouncing (and laughing!) on the 'suspension' bridge with the older kiddos
*Lunch with Anne! So GREAT to catch-up/re-connect! Again, soon! (and THANK YOU for the adorable tiger squirrel ... hee!)
*A bit of nap-time down-time
*Chatting over the fence with our awesome new neighbors (hmmmm ... will there be future collaborations?)
*G, Ru and I all biked to the park from 6:30-8:00 and had a blast. With the amazing weather ... seemed everyone was out at the park.

AND, G and Ru went to the store this morn., which allows for a bit of quiet time to blog ... really, to contemplate all those wonderful things in our lives.

FEEL GOOD.

May 20 - What's It Going to Be?

Today was off to a lovely start with training my friend, Flo. Always a good time! And, we were able to laugh about the finer points of our previous nights "girl night." Smiles.

BEST to Flo and Jon re: fixing the cars!!!

Lunch with Guillo was also fun and oh-so-yummy! Indian/Nepalese!

BEAUTIFUL day here in Denver.

After doing some work-stuffs ... ideas for training, wellness offerings, etc. (Hmmmm ... what will come/what's it going to be?) ... took a long and wonderful walk through the hood.

The not knowing what direction I will go ... what path will present itself ... is exciting some days and unnerving others. Today I feel at PEACE with it.

Happy SUNNY Evening! (must go bathe my dirt-covered daughter - a day well lived! smiles!)
LOVE .

May 19 - Good. Better. Great.

Good. Better. Great.
That's the simple synopsis of today.

Well, I guess if being honest it would be: Salty-Cranky. Better. Great.

Woke up feeling drained/not-so-great ... Ru coughed quite a bit last night. (wish I could solve ALL ... a non-realistic-wish that is beautifully magnified by parenthood)

Morning-to-Nap was really fun ... we biked to our garden plot to do some watering, then spent 2 hours at the park. A gorgeous day! Many-an-acquaintance was at the park with us. Including new friends, April and Madison (who gives Ru a run for the money)

Evening - such a great time spent with Flo and Di! Ah, girl friends. Amazing conversations and so much intermittent laughter that the muscles in my face hurt! I'm still smiling.

BONUS ... a lovely wrap-up to my day with G and I catching-up pre-sleep (and pre-blog)

Perhaps I'll muse more tomorrow. For now ... I'm off to bed.
Sweet Dreams.
LOVE.

May 18 - 2010 vibe

So today started with 'my typical 2010 vibe.' Allow me to explain ...
It has felt like a time of waiting. A time of challenge. A time (if managed with a bit of grace) where I could stand to learn oh-so-much! (again, if managed with grace. wink.)

I guess, to explain in other words, I feel like I have to work much harder for optimism. Even when you have such logical clarity on just how good you have it ... there's this palpable feeling of ho-hum-ness.

Tracking with me?

THIS is the state I found myself in again today.

So, what am I grateful for?
* communicating with my husband on this exact topic - the waiting, the impatience
* knowing Ru is is great care - and having a ball - while I take my time to feel how I feel.
* keeping "at it" (taking steps to network, getting out there)
* choosing activities that I KNOW to make me feel better ... a nice long walk in a beautiful setting
* feeling better :)

It's the resolve and the TRUST that I remind myself to feel. Ours is an abundant world! I'll continue my process to better resonate with that energy, with WHAT IS (abundance, that is!)

And, what in the hell does that really mean?!?

For me - it means choosing those things that bring me back to my center, those things that LIFT!
* MOVEMENT
* People - friendships - SOCIAL, SOCIAL, SOCIAL
* occupation ... yeah, having things that you choose to put your energy into each day (and your putting in of your energy doesn't feel like a drain ... that is key, I think!)

All these things and more ... so as to more gracefully and GRATEFULLY honor and enjoy "The Gold" ... Guillermo and Ruby! And, all my wonderful family and friends! And, this day-to-day life that I am living!

Hmmmmm ... I feel EVEN better now!
LOVE.

Monday May 17

Another great client day. Really enjoying working with individuals toward greater health!
Ru and I had a full day, too! Park and an impromptu hang-out with Miss Karen, Ronnie and Baby Sam. Great for the kiddos and us adults alike :)
Finally ... an early arrival home for Guillo. We took advantage of the BEAUTIFUL-weather day and had a snack and drink on the patio followed by a mini-park visit (again! ah, lucky Ru! smiles)

Now .. Ru is singing 'the wheels on the bus' and the alphabet while splashing in the tub.

G and I look forward to a bit of chill time post Ruby-bedtime. And, an early bed for us too!

Good Night.
SMILES.

May 16

Ah, what a great evening away!

G and I walked all over Boulder ... enjoying a bite here and a drink there.
More of the same this morning (only the drink was strong coffee!) And what a gorgeous morning it was.

Walking along the cherry-blossom filled streets of West Boulder, listening to street musicians (holy-talented violin player), meandering for 3 hours with no set schedule! All is right with the world.

Ru had a blast with Katie and Drew, and slept like an angel. Again, all is right with the world.

We'll close our weekend enjoying a backyard BBQ with great friends. Ah ... all is right with the world. :)

SMILES!

May 15 - preemptive gratitudes

OH-SO-THANKFUL for our wonderful friends ... those we love and trust to care for Ru when G and I want to steal away for much-needed catch-up time.

We're off to Boulder!

Thank You Katie and Drew!!!!!!

Big Love.
Happy Day.

May 14

* Sunny morning ... perfect for meeting some friends at the park.
* Watching Ru go up and chat with EVERYONE ... and ... watching her interact and 'teach' 3 yr old Maddox to go down the bar slides. What a personality on this kiddo!
* Chilling on the couch with family (in a full on food coma ... Mmmmm falafel and hummus!)

Brain is shutting down ... must sign off (wink and smile)

Happy Friday!

May 13

So this practice isn't habit yet (of course) ... but again, part of why I'm doing this. Periodic forced awareness and gratitude is oh-so-much better than hardly any at all!

Today was a lovely day.
* Ru slept in til 8am! She needed rest and I actually read a book while drinking my coffee this morn.
* Two awesome client sessions
* Lunch with Guillermo (we're committing to more "us time" during the week ... even if not a standard date night)
* A walk and coffee with a great friend who's b-day was today :)
* Downtime to read and relax. Ahhhhhh.
* And, picked up Ruby from 'pre-school' where she was ALL smiles per usual - what a social little girl, who can chat any ones' ear off! (Hmmmm. Wonder where she gets that?!? wink and smile)
* Also love watching young talent ... the kid on Ellen today who covered a Lady Gaga song. Impressivo!

While I will surely find myself in impatient or control-freak spaces time and again ... (yeah, trying to control anything outside yourself is pretty futile. And a 2 year old?! Damn silly/insane to try!)
And, I still wake some days wondering if I could just stay in bed for 5 more hours (!!) ...

This practice has proven helpful already. I'm feeling more myself!

Until tomorrow.
Sweet Dreams!

May 12 - Sense of Ease

Day 3 and feeling at ease.

While no earth-shatteringly blissful happenings ... I am struck by the days sense of EASE. Everything worked out .... well ... NICE.

* Ru and I enjoyed our day spent together (despite cold and snowy conditions which don't lend themselves to her all-time favorite activity - running around like a crazy-girl at the park).
* Every outing came with front row parking spots, open equipment at the gym, a soft cushy (highly sought after) chair at the coffee shop and a free dinner to boot ... Damn!
* Three job ideas/leads/reach-outs! and another day opened up at pre-school for Ru (ooooh ... the anticipation of it all)
* Chilling at a coffee shop while I type this ... and smiling.

Until tomorrow ... PEACE.

May 11

So, I'm at the park with Ru. It's cold (to me) .. she's having a blast. I find myself in my head - a place in which I spend too much time these out-of-good-balance-days. When suddenly my thoughts come to this blog/this experiment. Ah, even if forced ... how nice to have that mindfulness, that awareness, that focus on the present moment. Forced because I NEED to stay present to the moment every once in a while if I'm to write each evening about those moments for which I'm grateful, those moments that pull me into the NOW. So while it feels a bit like homework or a task right now (not as natural as other times in my life) ... It is this forced mindfulness that is first on my list of gratitudes for THIS DAY!

Others:
*rock-star parking and a $3 happy hour glass of red
*a partner who is beautifully human, just like me ... and is IN for the journey - where ever on the roller coaster we may find ourselves.
*Purely authentic belly laughter from anyone .. but especially Ruby :)
*Finding and TAKING time to decompress, release tensions from my not-so-great-mom-day, moments of letting go. (need to get better at creating more of this ... for ME, and everyone around me!)
*Tomorrow is a new day!

GOOD NIGHT.
LOVE.

May 10 Gratitudes

Ruby's wicked-good robot dance! (smile as I type this!)
The natural high after working with my two Monday clients. (and taking notice of such good feelings!)
New connections with contacts-of-old ... from grade school! (ah, Facebook)
Beautiful sunny (slightly humid) morning.
The way the setting sun hit the bottom of the clouds.
Going to bed at 8:45pm ... Good Night!

BEGIN!

DAY 1 of my Gratitude Experiment:

I chose to BEGIN my officially-unofficial Gratitude Experiment the day after Mother's Day for a couple key-to-me reasons.

A. Being Mama to our 2.4 yr. old daughter, Ruby, is without doubt an aspect of my life for which I am MOST GRATEFUL!
B. Incidentally, it is also the thing (the role) that challenges me most, pushes almost every button I have, brings out some of my worst personal/human flaws .. AND .. thank the heavens also shows me some of my best, most full-of-grace attributes.

WHY THIS GRATITUDE EXPERIMENT?
I have felt more challenged - more pushed to my limits - this last 6 months than I can remember in all my life. As I seek out/create a greater, more perfectly-me home/work-life balance ... I want to be truly aware and engaged in the process. I want to create a scenario where I more effectively bring into my life that which truly speaks to my heart, my strengths, my passions. And, perhaps even more important: I want to be oh-so-mindful of all those little things in my current day-to-day that ALREADY ARE. More consciously grateful for what IS as I move forward creating 'what will become' ... One Day at A Time!

WHAT WILL THIS LOOK LIKE?
Without setting any rigid guidelines and thus limiting this experiment, my intention is to blog each day about those things for which I am most grateful and happy. Those things that perhaps stop me in my tracks and get me out of my head for even one blissful moment! And, too, in an effort to honor all aspects of me and my process ... to discuss those rough spots (without which there would be no growth opportunities).

WHY BLOG?
Simply put, this is my accountability measure. My commitment to me, this process and anyone who might choose to read/follow along. For this ... I am grateful!

GAME ON!