August 11 - Careful Observance

It's time for more of it! Careful observance of my attitude and thoughts, that is.

This isn't a new idea for me. Merely a time where I'm again reminded that MY attitude and perceptions ... 'the story' that I tell myself ... is unbelievably POWER-FULL!

Oooooh, so it IS time to give some attention and energy to seeing all the ways in which life is working for me, is wonderfully-wonderful, is co-conspiring with me!

That last little bit is KEY.

Life co-conspires when my outlook is that of lack, frustration, etc.
Life co-conspires when my outlook is that of wonder, flow, happiness, little victories, etc.

Incidentally, this very topic is largely why I embarked upon this blog.
You see, naturally/historically my outlook has been one of happiness, lightness, play (not that there aren't a few self-sabotaging blocks in there ... I mean come-on, how boring!? wink!)

So, the idea is to be more mindful and watch/observe my attitude and thoughts. Observe those less-than-ideal mental rants. I do not speak of a bad day, a bad moment, a less-than-lovely way of handling a situation; I speak of PATTERNS. When I notice I've been in a state or space of lack or frustration for longer periods. THIS is when I think it's important to not only get logical, methodical, action-oriented with respect to making positive-for-me change ... but also time to WATCH and OBSERVE the story I tell myself.

Okay, so now I'll have more clarity about my sabotaging stories. Then what? Hmmmmm ...

Commit to better supporting ME and my interests so as to again spend more regular time in an inspired state of mind.

AND, I think I'll throw a little pity-party bon voyage! I'm going to get ritualistic about it! (maybe I'll dance, sing, burn, laugh, cry ... perhaps all, who knows! I do know I want to FEEL the letting go! Decadent, huh!?!)

Say THANK YOU and GOOD-BYE to the 'what is wrong with my life' stories.
THEY NO LONGER SERVE ME (as if they ever did).

August 10 - Multiple Personalities?

From one day to the next ... the pendulum swings :)
Really though, do you ever get the sense that the ups and downs are a bit more intense than other times?

Yesterday ... ho hum, challenging, long.
Today, everything feels great, despite the fact that my car didn't start this morning and I had to reschedule a client because if it (plus, the day is flying by).

In these "great" stages I'm thankful that I have clarity around the dichotomy of it all.

I entertain, for a moment, the "I'm a bad Mom" story ... because clearly I'm having a better day today because I'm getting a break from Mom-hood, and I don't have to negotiate every little power-struggle-transition of the day. (we're in Ruby "terrible-two" mode)

But then, I rise a bit higher. I find my heart and truth in the mix.

* I AM feeling good because I don't have to negotiate all the 'my-way-or-the-highway' stuff (incidentally, both Ru and I have to own this).
* I am feeling both wonderfully-optimistic-excited AND will-it-get-here-already-for-the-love about working more in October.
* I am NOT surprised that this phase of life has felt challenging (given me and my demeanor) and instead choose to look at it as validation of my strengths and passions, of who I am.
* I know the polar-opposite pendulum swing (aka. multiple personalities / I-feel-crazy-because-of-the-swing ) will level out again with the better-for-me balance coming

But hey ... talk to me tomorrow, I just may feel like life is HARD again. Getting through!

And, for today ... I LOVE It (ALL)

And Today: Thank you to Heather, Roland, Jon, Flo (though she doesn't even know why)

Again, LOVE Life!